Love kills gangsterly
by Crock-fever
Summary: Naruto and Sasuke really do love each other but like in any other relationship things happen: People get in the way for them and in the end it seems like everything is lost for Naruto, but will it change?SasuNaru,minor character death.
1. Chapter 1

Sasuke and I were best friends since we were born. His parents really liked me. My parents? Well, my father died right after I was born and my mother…well no one knows what happened to her. I lived in the Uchiha residents for a while. Later, Sasuke's whole family was killed by his brother, now a masked murderer, when he was eight. He gets really sensitive whenever I talk about it, so I don't ever bring it up.

Sasuke and I both lived in an orphanage for a while. It didn't take long until Sasuke was adopted. In fact, it was only about a year until he was adopted, which is kind of surprising.

He now lives with his new parents. It took me six years until my mother (biological one) came for me, so I live with her since about two weeks ago. She's not as great as I thought she would be. My mother doesn't beat me, but she acts as if I don't exist…she drinks frequently though. It sucks because only around people or when she's drunk is when she finally treats me like I'm her son. I'm now in high school (freshman…sucks but whatever).

People don't really like me because they say I was possessed by a demon when I was a baby, it was all over the news…everywhere…so everyone knows….including their children.

Sasuke's the only friend I have. Sasuke's parents are terrible though…well his mom left after he was adopted…so it's just the dad…he gets drunk **all** the time and he hits him. He does drugs right in front of him too. Don't tell anyone but his 'father'…raped him. One night, he called me and told me. He was crying his eyes out. I was so mad, I was so close to escaping from the hellhole (orphanage) and shooting his 'dad' in the fucking head. Sasuke and I tell each other everything…and I do mean…everything. Sasuke's what some people may call "emo" or for the _really_ shallow people: "gothic".

He wears black clothes, mascara, and eyeliner all the time. He's always depressed and always has his hands in his pockets and a deep hole in his heart. Luckily his parents were nice enough to buy him a cell phone. I, on the other hand had to buy one for myself…with my own money.

I've always tried to get him to call DSS on their asses but he says 'parents that suck are better than no parents at all' and I'm all like 'NOT WHEN THEY BEAT YOU!' and I don't really know what it feels like to have parents…Sasuke's mom was the closest I ever got.

We just recently started school in September and it's October now. I just got home and I'm waiting for my mother to come home. She works in a McDonalds. I wouldn't call us 'ghetto' even though we live in there, but we are extremely poor. I have to get my clothes at charities. Sasuke and I are supposed to hang out, but he said his dad was home and wanted him home. Damn bastard.

Almost everyday Sasuke gets…you know…raped. Whenever his dad says that we all know what it means. I asked him if he wanted me to sneak over and keep him company afterwards and told me to wait a couple hours. A lot of girls like Sasuke, but he's never interested. I try and get to him to go out with a couple of girls, but he never wants to. I want to call him and see how he's doing but I'm scared I'll 'disturb' his father.

I hate waiting, knowing what his stupid dad is doing. I threatened to call DSS all the time but Sasuke always says, 'Don't, I don't want to be alone again…please don't do that to me…I don't want people knowing about you know what…Naruto…please…I don't want anyone to know…' It really makes me upset when he begs and I always give in. I wish I didn't though. I'm kind of happy that my mom doesn't do anything like that. I find it extremely hard to call her my 'mom' because I've only known her for like two weeks.


	2. Chapter 2

After a couple hours, I decide on sneaking over to Sasuke's room, my mom will never know…she never even comes into my room. She's always out. It's barely night fall but I'm going to do it anyway. I get on some black clothes I have, and walk all the way to Sasuke's house…it isn't that far…but it's a ways…I don't care though, I'm used to walking to my destinations. I even walk to Sasuke's house just to walk to school.

What I find weird is that my whole life revolves around Sasuke. I could care less what happens to me for the most part. When I get there, I throw a really big rock on Sasuke's second floor room. He opens the window and motions me to hold on. I hear his footsteps running downstairs. He opens the door and motions me in quickly.

"Hurry Hurry!" he whispers. I run in and he forces me upstairs quickly. He pushes me in his room and closes the door and locks it, then sighs.

"Are you okay?" He stares at me, so emotional.

"What do _you_ think?"

"It's okay Sasuke…I'm here for you…" I open my arms to hug him in comfort but he just walks by me with one glance and sits on his bed, hugging his knees. Damnit. I look down and sit on the floor next to his bed. He always does this every time 'it' happens.

"I don't know how much longer I can take this…" He looks at me, and lifts his sleeve. His wrists are covered in scars, but there is a fresh cut. Sasuke isn't one of those whiny little cutters…he **really** slits himself. So deep, you can see the meat beneath his skin. He pulls back up his sleeve.

"Sasuke…don't do that to yourself….I told you…" Sasuke glares at me continuously.

"I don't know what else to do…" He looks back down and stares at his wrists for while, then looks back up at me. "I guess I should be used to it by now, huh." I shake my head.

"No…It's not normal for father's to do that…you shouldn't be used to it…but don't take it out on yourself…have you ever said 'no'?" His eyes widen as if I had said a jinx.

"No…he'd…he'd kill me…." He began to shake. "I'm scared to even try…he's always has a gun in his pocket." I smile to him.

"You want to sleep over my house?" He shakes his head 'no'. "You want me to sleep over?" He nods slowly, and smiles reassuringly. Sasuke never really has a real smile…it's always forceful. He doesn't talk much either, he only talks to me…and he gets really nervous whenever teachers ask him questions if he goes to school. Sometimes, his dad **makes** him stay home…and you know…Anyway, I don't hesitate…I slowly sneak out the back door with Sasuke trailing behind me with is sweatshirt zipped up and his hood on. He takes one hand out of his pocket and drags it next to mine.

I want to just grab his hand and hold it…but…I don't. When we finally get to my house, I walk inside and leave Sasuke out, but he eventually comes in anyway. I pack clothes for tomorrow and clothes to sleep in…and my teddy bear that my father would've given me if he was still alive…don't tell anyone though. Sasuke knows I sleep with a teddy bear and that's it.

If anyone were to know, my reputation as a gangster would be ruined. Sasuke and I walk all the way back to his house. When we get to his house it's almost eleven. I can never have fun with Sasuke anymore; he used to be so playful…now…I don't even know him. I sleep on the floor with limited pillows and limited blankets. I want to sleep in the same bed as him, but only if he asks me to. I'm not….too…tired….


	3. Chapter 3

The door bangs. Sasuke jolts up.

"Naruto! The closet quick!" I don't hesitate but jump into his closet and hide while looking through one of his cracks. Sasuke's dad is practically banging the door down.

"Sasuke! OPEN UP NOW OR ELSE!" Sasuke looks like he's about to cry.

"C-coming!" He reluctantly opens the door. What really sucks is that Sasuke sleeps in nothing but his boxers and a black shirt. Sasuke begins to back up on his bed, so afraid…I never knew Sasuke could be so afraid of someone. His dad walks closer to him and punches him in the face and forces him on his stomach. Sasuke winces and clenches the bed for dear life. The dad begins unbuttoning Sasuke's pants as well as his. I'm not just going to stand here and watch my best friend get raped. I pull out my knife I always keep in my sock and storm out of the closet, holding it up to his dad's throat about ready to cut him.

"Naruto! Stop it! Stop!" He winces and covers his ears while he sits up and hugs his knees and rocks back and forth. "Don't kill him. Please don't kill him." He repeats that over and over to himself…kind of whispering but I can still hear what he's saying. I start to shake. I don't know what to do. Sasuke really wants me to stop….but I don't want his dad to hurt him anymore. I lower my knife and glare at him deeply.

"I'm warning you…if you **ever** touch Sasuke…ever again…I'll…kill you!" His dad tries to punch me in my face but I simply dodge and walk away. What a drunk. I wait for Sasuke outside of his room to walk to school.

"Get your sweet ass to school before you're late, you little runt." His dad looks at him and walks out of the room but makes sure he glares at me before heading down the stairs. I walk back to his room and begin to change. Sasuke is starring at me.

"What? You're not going to change for school?" Sasuke is just starring at me. It's kind of creeping me out due to the fact that I'm changing. "Hello? Sasuke? Hello? Knock knock." Sasuke shakes his head and comes back to earth.

"Huh? Oh, we do need to wear clothes to school, don't we?" I roll my eyes and smack my forehead.

"Well we sure as hell can't go naked." Sasuke smirks.

"Well, why not?" I raise an eyebrow.

"Are you serious?" Sasuke forces a laugh upon himself but it's very little.

"Nah, of course not." He gets up and begins to change. After we both are fully dressed, I take his hand and we walk out the door, ignoring his dad after he spanks Sasuke lightly and head on our way to school.


	4. Chapter 4

After stupid Kakashi's science lesson of death, Gai's social studies, and Kurenai's language arts lesson, I enjoyed my lunch…a peanut butter and banana sandwich with saltine crackers and a small juice box. Lunch is my favorite subject. Ahh, sweet lunch. Sasuke decided he wanted to sit with Gaara today, so I sat all by myself.

I feel a deep emptiness while looking at Sasuke and Gaara talking. Just when did Sasuke stop talking to me enough to start talking to Gaara? Without Sasuke, there's a missing piece of me, and I start feeling self-conscious…like a whole bunch of people watching me. I hear someone coming. Ino sits right beside me.

"Hey demon breath…I have a question for you." I glare at her. I haven't heard that nickname since the third grade.

"Oh….sorry…I thought you were trying to talk to Naruto…I guess you _do_ have an imaginary friend after all."

"Shut up for once and just listen to me." I roll my eyes.

"What?"

"Do you like Hinata?" Ugh. Hinata, she never has anything to say…it's always 'uhh...uhh…I….I….hi…' She never even finishes a sentence. But I guess she likes me…whoa…that's a first…I guess I'll play along since Sasuke's getting a little too comfortable Gaara.

"Why?" She rolls her eyes.

"Well…Hinata likes you and she wants you to go out with her…so what do you say?" She cracks her knuckles like she's going to punch me. Pshh. Yeah, I could take her out in an instant. It's making me nervous though. I'm about ready to pull my knife on her.

"Sure." I go back to eating my sandwich. Ino smiles widely and walks back over to her 'crowd'. I stare and glare back at Sasuke and Gaara. What's this? Sasuke's smiling? And it looks like it's a real smile? I…I can't even make him smile like that anymore. I wanted to make him smile for real. Damn Gaara. I

suddenly feel a strange tint of jealousy and a large loss of appetite. Sasuke completely dumped me for Gaara. I can feel the chunks rising out of my throat.

Just then, I look up to see Gaara plant a kiss on Sasuke's lips. Heh, Gaara's going to get it now. Sasuke's smiling….and blushing. This is terrible. I didn't want to see that. Does that mean Sasuke is…_gay_? Hinata suddenly comes and sits with me. I stuff my half eaten sandwich back in the paper brown bag.

Hinata is twirling her fingers and looking at me. I don't like Hinata. She's nice…but weird. I'm not saying I'm not weird, but at least I know how to talk. I guess I'm going out with Hinata now. I force a smile the best I can and hope she believes it.

"Hey….Hinata…" Hinata smiles and blushes.

"Hi…Naruto…" Wow, she said a sentence. I roll my eyes and stare at Sasuke again. They get up and Gaara takes his hand and they leave the lunchroom. I narrow my eyes. How could Sasuke do that to me? He was supposed to tell me everything and he keeps something this important from me? That bastard. I'm scared to get mad at him, but this is kind of important. I guess I'm loosing my one and only friend to Gaara. I'm not hungry anymore.

"Would you excuse me for a second?" I get up and follow them, quietly. I'm about to go yell at him. I can't believe my eyes, they're making out on the wall. I clench my fists. I don't know what's wrong with me. I just feel so…jealous. Sasuke glances at me and his eyes widen and he pulls Gaara off of him…blushing. I can't believe him. Why wouldn't he tell me? Why would he sneak it from me?

"Uhh…hi…Naruto…" I glare and just walk off but I know they continue. My best friend is gay and he didn't tell me. Great. This must mean that he doesn't even think of me as even his best friend. After all I've done for him. I always keep him company and I'm always there for him and then he goes and makes out with Gaara. I hate this. I sit back down with Hinata. She's not even talking to me. Apparently we're going out. This is probably the worst day of my life.


	5. Chapter 5

After school, I walk home alone just to be alone at home again. Sasuke's hanging out with Gaara…and walking home with **him**. I hate Gaara. He took Sasuke from me…he pretty much took everything because Sasuke is my everything. Sasuke didn't even try and talk to me today. He completely ignored me. I don't get it. I stood up to his father. How could he do this to me and then not talk to me about it?

It makes me so mad. What does Sasuke see in Gaara? Why do I care so much? It's not like I _like_ Sasuke like that…right? I mean he's my best friend…not boyfriend. I'm sick of this shit. I'm going to talk to him about it. I pick up my cell phone and call Sasuke…pretty much the only number I have on my phone. It rings once….twice….

"Hello?"

"Hey Sasuke, what the hell?! How come you didn't tell me you were gay? Or that you liked Gaara? I thought we were supposed to be friends." He sighs.

"I don't want to talk about this right now."

"Well…you're going to. Now just tell me."

"It's not Gaara I really like okay?" He sounds angry. He's always fucking mad at me.

"Then why were you two making out?"

"I don't know…I honestly didn't want to…but he's been talking to me lately and he's the only one who would accept me if I'm gay."

"Sasuke, I would accept you if you told me you were gay."

"Ah come on Naruto, cut the shit…you make fun of gay people all the time."

"Well…and you haven't?"

"No….I haven't."

"Well…why wouldn't you tell me? If you don't like Gaara, then who do you like?"

"If you don't like Hinata then who do _you_ like?" What's he trying to prove?

"I asked you first."

"Fine Naruto…you want to know? I like **you**. There you happy?" He hangs up. Damnit. I hate it when people hang up on me. It's so rude and it makes me feel like they hate me. Sasuke likes **me**? Of all the people he could choose from? Me? It just doesn't make any sense. This is the first fight Sasuke and I ever got into. It hurts a lot. If he likes me, then why did he ignore me….for **Gaara**. Wait, he likes me. Do I like _him_? I don't know.

I was pretty jealous when Sasuke and Gaara were together. I think I do. I don't know. So all those times when Sasuke was watching me dress it was…whoa. As I look back, I really do like Sasuke. Not just like **love**. I love Sasuke. I'm in love with my best friend. No wonder my whole life revolves around him. Oh my god. I've got to tell him I like him back. But wait, he'll probably never want to talk to me ever again after what he just said. Oh well, it's worth the chance. I call him. It rings once.

"What Naruto?" He sounds upset. I hear his father yell at him. "Hold on a minute!! Make it quick. Hurry." Fuck. How am I supposed to tell him this quick.

"I uhh…I wanted to tell you…that I…I…"

"Come on, Naruto…I don't have time for this! Come on!"

"I like you too, okay?!" He hangs up. What the hell?! I just told him that I like him and just hangs up?! Fucking A! I need a smoke. I grab my pack from my backpack and my lighter. I take one of my cigarettes from the pack, put it in my mouth, light it and walk outside. I walk around the block, looking down. I glance up to see a bunch of gangsters gathering around starring at me…pointing at me. What? They never seen a teenage guy smoke before?

Shikamaru is in there. I didn't know Shikamaru's in a gang? Whoa. Oh no. They're coming towards me. I think they're going to kill me. Don't run away Naruto. They wouldn't dare. I stay in that exact same spot, smoking until they get to me. They all surround me and get closer. Shikamaru is wearing a hat, tipped to the side, baggy pants, and a shitload of chains with no shirt on. He raises his chin.

"You wanna join the gang?" one of them whispers. Huh? They want me to join a gang? Hmmm…well, I do need money.

"That all depends…do you get paid?" They all laugh, and then glare at me.

"Of course, that depends on what your mission is." Shikamaru whispers to me so the others can't hear him…and they don't. Well thank god someone is at least a little nice to me. One of them comes closer to me.

"Well? What do you say? If not…" he takes out his gun and points it to my head. "then I'll have to make sure you don't remember us asking." I raise my hands.

"Hey man, I'll join I'll join." I smile as believably as I can. They all smirk and the guy lowers the gun.

"Alright, first thing we gotta see if you got the guts." I raise an eyebrow and my mouth hangs open.

"Huh? What do you mean?" They all laugh again. I hate it when people laugh at me…unless it's Sasuke. I narrow my eyes a little.

"You gotta do somethin' to get in, dumb ass." My eyes narrow even more.

"Alright. What do I have to do?" They all laugh again.

"First, you gotta prove you ain't a wuss and can take pain…so you gotta drain half a cup of blood, and give it to us….then you gotta prove you're not afraid to kill someone. So you gotta kill someone." Whoa. I have to kill someone?

"How much is the pay would you say?"

"About 100 bucks each mission." Awesome! I could finally get that new cell phone…not prepaid!

"Alright I'll do it." I drop my cigarette on the floor and squish it. I take the knife out from my sock and pull up my pants. Without looking, I slice my knee open while one of the guys hands me a measuring cup. I let the blood pour down. I can't look at it or I'll get blood thirsty. I begin to drool just thinking about all the blood. I flinch and open one eye. My eyes gleam as I see all the blood, the cup is overflowing and I start sucking on my knee.

Then I see some random lady walking and I limp over to her and stab her in the throat. Heh heh heh. I feel so energetic. I feel so FREE! The blood draining from her is making me drool even more. I laugh and drop her and limp back over to the guys. They're staring at me in disgust. Oh my god. I'm….a murderer. Oh my god. I just killed a person! Oh my god! I….I….I'm disgusted in myself.

"So…he **is** the demon child…." I glare and sigh. I thought I'd feel worse about killing an innocent person…but not much matters right now.

"So am I in?" They all nod.

"Yeah, man we meet her tommorer. Same spot man, same spot." The leader says and walks off. I think I'll sneak over to Sasuke's house to see how he's doing. It's dark out now. He should still be awake now. I start on my way to Sasuke's house and throw a rock on his window. He's not answering. I throw another one. I see him and he looks out and smiles. He opens his window quickly and motions me to hold on. I hear his footsteps as he comes bursting through the door. He runs up to me and hugs the shit out of me.

"Naruto…I didn't mean to hang up on you…my dad took my phone and slammed it against the wall. It broke. I tried to call you back but…" I put my finger on his lips.

"Shh…I get it…It's okay. So can I come in?" Sasuke blushes and raises his eyebrow and starts for inside while I follow after. Once we get to his room he closes his door, locks it, and sits on the bed. I yet again, follow right after, I sit on his bed right next to him. He stares at my knee.

"Are you okay? What happened?" I start getting really nervous and cover it up.

"Uh….N-nothing! I just fell! Yeah! I fell." He raises an eyebrow and crosses his arms.

"Naruto…do you cut yourself? You should've told me." Well, I guess I could play along.

"Sorry, after you hung up I did get depressed…and I guess that's my result." He stares at me.

"Now, I'm not going to be a hypocrite but you shouldn't do that to yourself." He smiles lightly.

"I love it when you smile." His smile grows wider and I grab his hand.

"Thanks I guess." He looks at our hands intertwining with each other and looks back at me. "So what were you saying on the phone again Naruto?" Ah crap. He just has to bring that up doesn't he? That bastard. That's okay though. I'm not afraid anymore. After what I just did, I don't think I'm afraid of anything anymore.

"I like you too…no…I _love_ you…" He smiles wider. That's the first time I've seen him smile that big since before his parents died. I smile right back and I slowly get closer to him and plant my very first kiss on his soft, tender lips. He blushes and kisses me back right afterwards. He holds my hand tighter. I want to tell him what happened earlier…but…you know what? He wouldn't care, would he? I can wait a little longer.

My stomach growls. I forgot to eat, didn't I? Sasuke laughs…he's so cute when he laughs. I put my hand on my stomach and get a little nervous. It's so embarrassing when my stomach growls.

"Someone's hungry…you want something?" I nod slowly and he gets up and when he comes back he's got potato chips. I grab the bag and launch a handful of chips into my mouth. Sasuke decides to kiss me again with my mouthful of chips. I swallow and look at him.

"What was that for?"

"I don't know…I just needed it." He smiles and holds my hand again. Geesh, can he act even more like a girl? I lay down and he stares at me, quite offended. I can't help it, I'm exhausted. He lays beside me and lays on my chest. I'm….exhausted…


	6. Chapter 6

"SASUKE!! OPEN THIS GOD DAMN DOOR, RIGHT FUCKING NOW!!" Sasuke jolts and pushes me off the bed. Ow. I get up slowly and hide in his closet once more without him even telling me. He gets up and opens his door.

"Yes?" he sounds so innocent, his voice squeaks. His dad slaps him across the face and glares at him as Sasuke flies back and falls to the ground.

"THAT BOY'S HERE, AIN'T HE?" Sasuke looks so scared that he has no choice of lying. He nods, biting his bottom lip in fear and winces, afraid his father would hit him again.

"Y-yes…"

"BOY!! COME ON OUT THERE!" I angrily walk out of the closet. I'm in a gang now…I could totally kill him right now…just like I killed that other person. I'm not afraid…he should be afraid. I glare and cross my arms.

"Yeah?" He glares right back while Sasuke is curling on his bed looking scared.

"BOY, don't disrespect me!" Sasuke is so lucky I care about him because I could totally tear his dad's ass apart. I start to clench my nails into my crossed arm.

"I didn't do anything…" He raises his hands as if to punch me, then lowers it back down…heh heh…what's the matter…not so tough after what I did last time, huh.

"Why you always here, boy?" I want to just tell him…tell him everything that Sasuke and I went through together. Unfortunately, not only will Sasuke be totally mad at me…but his father would probably beat him and rape him until he completely forgets about me. I hate his dad so much.

"Sasuke's my best friend…" I can see Sasuke smiling while crouched up in a fetal position. His dad simply shrugs.

"You guys go to school now." He walks away. Thank god that's over with. I was so close to tearing his ass apart. Damn!! He makes me so mad. Sasuke and I smile at each other and get dressed for school. I have to wear his clothes today because I didn't bother packing anything.


	7. Chapter 7

At lunch, I'm finally happy enough to eat again. Apparently, I'm still going out with Hinata and Sasuke's going out with Gaara. All the girls are totally bummed that Sasuke is gay. Sasuke and I are I guess 'secret lovers'. I'm going to his place right after school. He said in about a week, his dad is adopting a new sister. Oh great. I don't see what the point of his dad adopting kids if he's just going to beat them.

It really bothers me. Tonight I have the whole meeting thing with my gang. Shikamaru smiles at me through the hallway from time to time. Tonight is my first mission…I wonder how much money I could get. I really need it; I can't take much more of this 'being poor' thing. It really pisses me off seeing a whole bunch of people with nice clothes and fancy things. I'm working on telling Sasuke about the whole gang thing pretty soon.

I know this may sound weird, but I think Sasuke is good enough for me to give myself up to if you get my meaning. I don't know, I'd hate to say it…but whenever I see him…whenever he talks to me on the phone…I get really….well…you know where I'm going with this. I think that it's nature's way of telling me I'm more than ready to have sex with Sasuke…even if he is a guy too. Hinata won't leave me alone though. She sits next to me, but doesn't even say anything…she just sits, twirling her fingers. It gets really annoying. Sasuke is always sitting with Gaara….it makes me even angrier.

--

After school, I rush over to Sasuke and he and I walk to his house. His dad will be inspected or else he can't adopt so he's going to act like a perfect father…so Sasuke can do whatever he wants…it's awesome. When we get there, we automatically run upstairs to Sasuke's room. We make out and talk for the next hour or so. I look at the time and it's ten.

I have to go meet up with my gang or I am so dead. I kiss Sasuke goodbye and make up some excuse that I have to do the dishes. I run home to the same spot we met at yesterday and the gang was already there, looking angrily at me. I smile and scratch the back of my head, not really knowing what to say as I approach them.  
"Hey guys…uh…sorry I'm late…"

"Nah man…it ain't cool…You gotta always be on time for this shit man." I nod.

"Right. So what's my first mission?!" I'm totally anxious to start something that will finally bring me money. I finally won't have to shop at charities. I finally can buy an ipod/mp3 player…just like everyone else. I can finally have what other people have. I pretty much won't have a care in the world. The leader holds a picture of some random person I don't even know.

"We know you good at killing…so that's what you be…da killa. That be your nick…got it?" I nod. Great. I'm the killer. How awesome. I kill people. (Hint: SARCASM!! I FUCKING HATE IT!!). I'm starting to believe people were right about the whole demon thing. How was I able to kill for the first time without being scared at all? I don't get it. Is it because of my childhood? Could this 'demon' still be inside of me…controlling me when I go crazy…making me do all sorts of bad things?

"Okay…who do I…." I can't even say it…they're going to think I'm a baby now…wonderful. "kill?" There I said it. They all laugh.

"Name: Zabuza Momochi. He's at home now. Address and everything you need is on the back of the picture." He hands me the picture. Honestly…I don't know if I'm ready for this shit. I nod. What am I getting myself into?!

"Where does he live?" They all laugh.

"Yo man, were you listening?! I said the address and everything you have to know is on the back of the picture." Oh…right…I knew that. I look at the back... 149 Tori Rd. I really don't want to do this. It freaks me out to know that I can kill people this easily. Oh well. I might as well get the job done so I can get the freaking money. I don't even bother looking at the rest of the gang for reassurance, I just run over to the guy's house. Looks like this guy's expecting someone to come due to his high tech security wires that are completely obvious…it's not even funny. I'm sure I can handle it though. I've dealt with this kind of thing before.

I find the whole power box on the side of the house and cut all the blue wires with the knife I always keep in my sock. All the power in the house shuts down. Apparently, he was watching television…so I guess he noticed. That was just too easy. He walks out and I hide behind the nearest thing I can find…a boat that just happened to be in his backyard. He rolls his eyes and goes to his bed and gets ready for bed. Heh, people let their guard down when they sleep…don't they…That means I have to wait until he goes to sleep. Fuck…I might be here a while.

I can't call anyone because I might make too much noise where he could hear me and come out. I come closer to the window by his bedroom and try not to make it too obvious that I'm spying. I think the most natural way(where cops won't find out he was murdered) is…hmm…I don't know…I look on the back of the picture…it says I need to kill him using 'drug overdose'…whatever that means…Wait a minute, overdosing on drugs…you can die from that…can't you? Whoa. Okay…but how am I supposed to fill everything he owns with drugs. What if I get caught…that would be terrible. I look closer in the window…looks like the dude's asleep. I suppose I could simply slip a shitload of pills into his mouth while he sleeps….but I have to wait until he's at least in deep sleep. God. This really could take a while…


	8. Chapter 8

HOLY SHIT! I fell asleep! Not good…not good! Thank god it's not light out yet…how long was I asleep? I look at my phone. Thank god…I've only been asleep for about 20 minutes. I slowly creep over to the door. What an idiot…he didn't even lock it. He must've been too nervous to lock it…if that makes any sense whatsoever. I slowly sneak into his medicine cabinet and find a bottle of benedryl. Heh heh, perfect. I open it and take about 5 pills out and put it back as if I never touched it. I slowly walk up to his room and slip them into his mouth.

He's got tons of drool in his mouth so I think he'll be fine. I slip one into his open mouth. He closes his mouth and swallows it. I slip another one in his mouth. I'm sure he's fully swallowed it. Another one. Another one. Another one. Damn. I'm out. Fuck fuck fuck. What do I do? I start shaking. I run over to the cabinet and grab another handful of pills. I stick them in his mouth…now twice. I think I've stuck more than twenty in there now. I think I'm okay. I put the pills back after sticking one more in there. I leave very nervously. I run back to the gang and they are all there…counting money. They look back to me.

"Aye man…it's da killa!" one of them shouts out. Man…I want to see Sasuke. I want him so bad…you have no idea.

"You kill him?" the leader says.

"More than twenty pills…think that's enough?" They smile and pat me on the back.

"Go home." My eyes widen…so bossy. I haven't seen my mom in a long time. It's making me kind of depressed. I nod and start walking home. She doesn't even care if I'm home or not. I want her to just notice me. She never even knows I exist. My cell phone rings. It's Sasuke. Yes! It's Sasuke. Maybe tonight…I can ask him if he wants to…God. I'm getting hard just thinking about it. I pick up my phone.

"Hello?" I sound way too excited. Bring it down a little Naruto.

"Hey…Naruto…I wanted to tell you that you can't sleep over tonight." I'm walking back to my house while listening to Sasuke talk.

"Oh…why?" I hear a voice in the back round. It sounds like….Gaara. Sasuke's shushing him while laughing a little. Why would Sasuke lie to me like that?

"Uh…I'm busy…what do you want?" What? Why is Gaara there then? I swear…if Gaara touches him…I thought Sasuke loved me. I feel like I'm going to just…no…don't cry Naruto.

"Busy with Gaara…?" Gaara stops laughing. He stops laughing. Not so funny when you're figured out…Huh Sasuke.

"Uhh…Naruto…how'd you know Gaara was here?"  
"I didn't…you just told me." I make sure my voice sounds like I'm laughing so I don't seem like such a jerk.

"Uh…right….uh…are you mad at me?" Am I mad at him? I don't know that answer to that question.

"Am I on speaker?"

"No."

"I will be if you do anything with him." I hang up. I don't need that. Sasuke

always knows the things that make me begging for more. It's so annoying.

He knows that whatever he does he can still take advantage of me. I walk inside. My mom is home. Her car is here anyway. She better be home. I walk over to her room. The door's open. I hear noises. It sounds like a guy is in there. I open the door fully and peek to see my mom in the bed with a man under the covers. I can see their feet hanging down. Ew…the one time she's home it's to have sex with some guy. Gross. Hey, it's not the worse I've seen.

I walk back out and into my room. I'm thinking about Sasuke a lot. Why can't he feel the same way about me? Why does he always have to mess with my emotions like that? I mean, he doesn't see me hanging out with Hinata, does he? No. So he has no right to see Gaara…even if they are going out. He totally ignores me all the time for Gaara. I want to be Sasuke's first…not Gaara. This is an outrage. I swear if Gaara and him do anything I won't talk to Sasuke ever again. My mom's bed is banging against my wall and I hear her laughing all sexually. I take off my shirt and pants so it's just my boxers.

I hate my life…I truly do…I lay down on the bed. Everything seems to be going to wrong…nothing ever goes right. Nothing in my life has ever been good. I bet Sasuke just lied to me about liking me, just to get me off of his back. It's really hard to sleep when you hear banging noises on your bed. I really wish Sasuke would call me back. I hung up on him…he should call me back if he really cared…man, I hate my life. I bet I'm not good enough for Sasuke. I pick up my phone and call Sasuke. It rings once.

"Hey Naruto."

"Hey…what happened to Gaara?"

"He left…"

"Oh…well can you talk?" He's sounding really sexy right now. Then again…he always sounds sexy.

"Uhh…sure." Speaking of sex…he sounds like he's having sex. Like he's talking in a moaning voice. It's really hot.

"What are you doing?"

"Lying down…you?"

"Same…" Damn…he grunts a little. Fuck.

"I'm so tired…" He sighs. Now he's sounding like he's moaning. Oh god. Here we go.

"What are you doing?"

"Stretching…why?" Damn. That didn't sound like stretching. I wonder if I slowly approach him to let him know I want to have sex…just to see his reaction and if he wants to do it. My hand slowly drifts down my boxers. Here we go. I start to slowly jack myself off and…damn it feels good.

"Sas…uke…" I moan out. I go faster…and faster. He sighs.

"Oh…I see how it's been all along…you know…you're just like my father." He hangs up. What?! I'm nothing like that rapist! Damnit. I finish up and call him again. It rings once. I hear someone pick up, but doesn't say anything.

"SASUKE! What was all that about?! What's wrong…you…you don't find me…attractive? What?"

"I don't want sex…ok?"

"But…why? Don't you want to loose your virginity?"

"That's already happened…and it was the worst ever."

"But…but…shouldn't you really want to do it with someone you love? Like me?" He's quiet. I honestly don't know what I did wrong. He sighs.

"I guess…"

"Does that mean you'll do it…with me?" I sound so pathetic…

"I don't know…I'm still deciding…"

"Please?" He sighs.

"I'll think about it, okay?" Well…I guess this is the farthest I can push him. I mean it's not like I can force him into it or anything. I sigh.

"Alright, good enough I guess…"

"Now can I go to sleep? I'm exhausted."

"Yeah sure…I love you Sasuke."

"I love you too, Naruto." He hangs up. My mom is still at it. I don't know how I'm going to fall asleep.


	9. Chapter 9

It's been a couple of weeks….it's Halloween now. I'm supposed to spend it with Sasuke, but who knows if he'll blow me off for Gaara. He still hasn't told me my answers about you know what. Which is okay I guess…I mean I still haven't told him about the whole 'gang' thing. So far I've gotten about 700 dollars from my missions.

Sasuke's being kind of mean to me lately. I mean, he hasn't asked me to come over…he ignores my calls…and he's always talking to Gaara. His background on his phone is a picture of him and Gaara. It really pisses me off. Is he falling for Gaara? I don't know what I'd do if that were to ever happen! I've loved Sasuke since as long as I can remember and it would shatter my heart into a thousand pieces.

It sucks so much it even sucks the breath out of me sometimes. I wish he'd know how much it hurts. I didn't even get to enjoy taking advantage of his father while he was being inspected.

Sasuke has a new sister now…I haven't got to meet her because Sasuke completely ignores me now. I even forgot her name…it's something like….Oh forget it…what's the point anymore? I've been saving up all my money to get Sasuke a wicked awesome Christmas present…it may be far off…but my gang is taking a break for a while….so I'm going to need to save as much as I can.

Right now I'm sitting at lunch. Hinata is sitting next to me of course…doing nothing but twirling her fingers. This is really getting annoying. Sasuke won't even talk to me. Is he mad at me? I don't understand…I haven't eaten anything for the past 4 days now. I'm too depressed to eat. Half the girls at my school don't eat…it's pretty weird if you ask me. Wow, that was completely random…oh well. Anyways, after school Sasuke ignores me again. I run up to him and hit him in the shoulder lightly.

"What's up with you? Are you mad at me or something?" Gaara's with him.

"NO! Quit asking!" I don't get him anymore!

"Then why are you ignoring me?!" This just annoying.

"Because…I have a boyfriend Naruto…you're supposed to spend a lot of time with your boyfriend you know." WHAT ABOUT ME!? Am I nothing to him now? I look down.

"We're…supposed to spend…Halloween…together…" He's looking at me so cruelly.

"Oh puh-lease…we've been spending Halloweens together since forever…I think you can deal with one without me…right? Why don't you spend it with…Hinata?" Why is this happening to me? Why doesn't anything good happen in my life? Honestly.

"Right. I'll just be alone…" Could it be that Sasuke likes Gaara more than me? I just want to jump off of a building. I turn back and walk away…even though my house is the same way they're going. Damnit. We were supposed to spend Halloween with each other…I knew he was going to blow me off for Gaara. I just knew it. I have to turn back. I might as well walk with them…I turn back around and they stare at me like I'm crazy.

"My house is over…there" Sasuke rolls his eyes. What's wrong with him? Why does he hate me so much? WHAT DID I DO!? Everything is completely silent until I get to the turn in which leads to my house.

I walk all the way back to my house and my mom is home again. What the hell? This is weird. My mom is never home. I walk in. My mom rushes over to me in some skimpy little outfit. She holds out her hand and as I look closer I see a diamond ring on her finger.

"I'm engaged!" She hugs me. What the hell? She leans over and presses her lips up against my ear…I feel so violated. "Don't worry sweetie…things are going to change…he's rich…We'll finally have money." Is my mom just using him for money? Hmm…it does sound like her.

"Does that mean we have to move?" I don't want to move.

"Of course…but unfortunately, we have to wait a couple months….we're getting married in January." I swear…my mom is such a fucking slut. It's so annoying. I hate her at times (now that I got to know her a little). Sometimes I wish that she never came for me….but I'd kind of rather be here than the orphanage. When she finally lets me go I walk over to my room. I couldn't afford a Halloween costume so I can't go anyway.

This sucks. I don't want Sasuke seeing Gaara anymore…it hurts too much. I'm just going to take a shower and watch television until I pass out….the worst part is…I don't even get candy…at least at the orphanage they gave out candy…of course my mom can't afford fucking candy.


	10. Chapter 10

It's now November, almost close to thanksgiving. Everything is going as plain as usual. My gang got back in progress…I'm killing a lot. I've now got about 2,000. I'm thinking about buying Sasuke a laptop…I'll have enough money by Christmas. My mom is hogging all her 'fiancé's' money so I have to scrap it all up on my own. Sasuke's still hanging out with Gaara. I'm at home again.

It's a Saturday…Thanksgiving is about five days away. I'm supposed to hang out with Sasuke's family on Thanksgiving too…but who knows if he'll blow me off for Gaara. Gaara's hanging out with him right now. I miss hanging out with Sasuke. Every time we **do** hang out we mess around and stuff but I'm not too sure if he really likes me as much as I like him. My life is honesty going downhill. My mom is home again. To be honest…I think she may be pregnant but I don't know for sure. I don't know what I'll do if she is. Maybe Gaara has gone home. I search my front pocket for my phone and call Sasuke. It rings once.

"Hey Naruto…what's up?"

"Nothing…umm…Are you busy? Do you think I could come over tonight?"

"Um. I don't know…maybe…just come over anyway." Oh my god. Sasuke actually wants me to come over! AMAZING!

"Okay! I'll be over in a little while." I smile knowing that Sasuke actually wants me to come over.

"Alright then…see you then. I love you." He said it. Maybe he's telling me he's ready to have sex.

"I love you too baby." I hang up. Maybe I shouldn't have said 'baby' but I couldn't help it. I pack up all my stuff and head to the door.

"Mom, I'm sleeping over at Sasuke's. Bye." I don't even wait for a reply because I know she doesn't care. By the time I get there…I don't know whether to throw a rock at his window or to just walk in. I pick up my phone and call him. It rings once and as always he picks up on the first ring.

"Hey…where are you?"

"I'm outside your house…"

"Well come in then…my dad said it's cool." He seems a lot happier. Maybe this is Gaara's doing. I really hope not though. I walk to his door and open it and there's Sasuke…standing right there. He kisses me and then takes my hand to go upstairs. Once we get there, he locks his door. It's weird. I don't hear his dad or anything. I sit on his bed.

"Where's your dad?" His eyes widen. He walks over to me and his eyes lower seductively.

"Let's not talk about that right now…" He lifts his hand and points his finger up and puts his finger on my nose. What the hell? He lowers it past every inch of my body until he gets to….oh god…he's touching me in that place. He slowly climbs on top of me like a cat. He's looking at me all seductively. His face is so close to mine it's not even funny. He kisses me and his head lowers all the down. What is he doing? Why is it this all the sudden? I mean before he was all 'I don't want sex okay?'

"Sasuke…what are you doing?" He looks up to me with his head an inch from my crotch. He's unbuttoning my pants. Oh god. There goes my little friend.

"I've been thinking…about what you said…and…I think I'm ready now…but let's start with this…since I know how to do it…after all…I'm not a virgin." He unzips my pants. Oh god. He takes 'it' out of my pants. I just want to…my hand slowly drips down my stomach, dying to get to it's destination until Sasuke grabs my wrist.

"Uh uh uh…let me do that…" He looks at my dick and smirks. "Whoa….that's a mighty cock you got there." He looks up at me; he's making me self conscious. He sticks it in his mouth and starts giving me head. My eyes roll back in pleasure…it feels so good. Oh god. I think I came already. Sasuke smirks at me. I'm too out of breath to say anything. He's chuckling.

"What's so funny?" He looks at me, smirking.

"That was way too fast…care to try again?" Oh my god…why is he being like this? It's awesome. I smirk but I can't think of a snappy line to fit this moment.

"Oh yeah..." That was so lame. He grabs my dick and slowly slips his lips on the tip of my cock, slowly going into his mouth. Sasuke uses his teeth while he deep throats himself with my cock and then gets serious. He goes faster and faster each second. I roll my eyes back again and moan as soft as I can which comes out as a grunt. After a few more erotic thrusts into Sasuke's mouth, I finally cum. Sasuke lays beside me after wiping the white semen from his mouth and onto his shirt. He climbs back on top of me and kisses me.

"Was it good?" I smirk.

"The best." He smiles. I don't get this new sexy Sasuke, but I like it anyway. "I love you Sasuke." I'm kind of out of breath.

"Yeah." I take off my pants and my shirt.

"What are you doing?"

"Getting ready for bed." He nods. "Hey Sasuke…can we talk?" He looks scared.

"Oh no…you're not breaking up with me now are you?"

"No…umm…well what's up with you and Gaara? I mean you guys are always with each other…and I thought you loved **me.**" His eyes widen in fear as he looks left, then right.

"Well…truth be told…he kind of forces me into everything…like my father…abusively…you know what I mean?" I clench my fists and then sigh to get calm. I'm deciding on not making this a big deal.

"Are you going to break up with him?"

"I'm scared…what if he hits me."

"If he hits you…let me know…and I'll take care of him." He smiles.

"Alright…I'll break up with him." I join in the smiling.

"So…about your dad…" He rolls his eyes and sighs.

"Yeah…what about him?"

"What the hell is up with him? Does he do that thing to you anymore?"

"No…he's got my sister for that now…I was his only way of getting anything…but now he has a daughter…so he doesn't need me anymore…"

"So, what does he do now?"

"He hits me still…but he doesn't…you know…he sometimes ignores me for my sister…my sister hasn't talked since the first time she came here. She's a mute."

"Where is your sister now?"

"She's sleeping with my dad tonight…in his bed…Apparently, she wasn't a virgin when she got here…you know what I'm saying?" Oh god. Sasuke seems somewhat…jealous? I don't know…like it doesn't bother him…but it should. Sasuke has been known to be quite the selfish kind. I decide not to talk about it.

"So…when are we going to do the real thing?" Sasuke smirks.

"Whenever I feel like it…" Damnit. He's got me whipped (on a leash) and it's killing me, knowing he can take advantage of me at anytime and he knows that I'll give in. Damn him. It's driving me insane.

"Oh…when do you think you'll want it?"

"When I'm in the mood." God damnit. Sasuke always gets what he wants. I'm too desperate to argue so I just sigh.

"I see." I don't really know what else to say. I guess now it's time to sleep.


	11. Chapter 11

It's been another month…Christmas break is here…Oh, thanksgiving? Sasuke finally didn't blow me off for Gaara. They still haven't broken up. It's aggravating. Anyway, I got Sasuke the laptop and I've got about a thousand bucks left. I can get my mom something, and I can get an ipod or something. I'm just going to get my mom a necklace because she's already got enough. She's like one of those ladies you see on television where they take a bath in money and laugh. It's really weird. I think she has actually done that.

I still don't know if she's pregnant because she hasn't told me anything but she's acting really weird. She throws up a lot and she's always in the bathroom. She did tell me that she quit her job at McDonalds…there goes my discount. Christmas is in two days so tomorrow is Christmas Eve.

Sasuke talks to me a lot but we still haven't had sex…but he gives me head a lot. I gave it to him I think twice. I don't get why he's so sexual all the sudden. Oh well, I guess it's because his stupid dad isn't paying attention to him. I don't really know whether he's sad or what.

Anyway, I'm on my way to this retarded Christian play with my 'step dad's' kid (Yeah, surprising? I just found out that he had a kid too). I think he's like 8 or something. I don't even know his name. Oh well. To be honest, I could really care less. I don't even know his roll. I'm just going to text Sasuke the whole time. Oh yeah, and I got a new phone…not prepaid. It also has texting. Anyways, we're almost there.

My mom is smiling in the passenger's seat wearing one of her new fancy dresses (it's still really skimpy). I don't know why but I get really pissed off whenever my mom smiles. Sarutobi (my mom's 'fiancé') is driving. My mom gets out the car, followed by Sarutobi. My mom has to practically drag me out of the car. I text Sasuke while walking into the death trap…I mean church. We sit down on the front row. This is so retarded. It's not my child, so why am I here?

When it was over, we went out to eat. It was retarded. I met the kid…he's extremely annoying but the bad part is…he fucking worships me. I hate it. I tried to ignore him, but he wouldn't leave me alone. I'm with him right now and I have to baby sit him tomorrow. His name is Konohamaru. I'm just going to let the kid do whatever he wants and invite Sasuke over. I'm in bed right now…listening to my mom have sex again. Well, that kind of rules out the whole 'pregnant' thing…I guess. I'm glad I don't have to go to school. I'm glad I don't have to see Hinata.

I know that's mean, but I didn't really want to go out with her in the first place, it was kind of forced on me. It's been months but I'm too lazy to break up with her. There's no point in having a relationship if she's just going to mute herself. Yeah sure, she talks to me sometimes…but not really. I'm so freaking tired but I have to wait for my mom to stop or else I fear I'm going to have nightmares. Oh well…screw the damn nightmares, I'm about to pass out.


	12. Chapter 12

Yes! Finally! Christmas Eve! I've been waiting so long for this moment. Sasuke's on his way over right now. It's about noon and the little brat is sleeping. I let him go back to sleep (more like forced) about two hours ago. I hear a knock on the door. Score! Sasuke! I run up to it and slam the door open but it smacks me in the face. Ow. I hold my nose and motion Sasuke inside.

I look at my hand that was once on my nose and it's covered in blood. Fuck. I hate nosebleeds. I start drooling. Oh god, it's happening again. I smack myself. Stop it Naruto! Stop! I fake a smile to Sasuke as we head over to my bedroom. I lie down on my stomach and bury my face in my pillow. I've got to find ways where I can't see the blood. I'm not even looking at Sasuke but he's coming on the bed. He's slowly climbing on top of me.

"Not a good position to lay down in Naruto…someone could easily take advantage of you…" Oh my god. Is Sasuke telling me he's going to have sex with me? Yes! This is my chance. I look at him and smirk. Fuck. I just realized that my face is covered in blood.

"What do you mean?" I'm trying to make it obvious that I don't know my nose is bleeding. He looks at me with widened eyes.

"Naruto, are you okay? You're bleeding…" I wipe my face with my hand and blood smears everywhere.

"Oh this? This is nothing." Knowing Sasuke he'll probably make a big deal about this. Better not stress it.

"It's not nothing." He runs over to the bathroom and grabs a roll of toilet paper and shoves some up my nose. "There…all better?" Ow. It feels like it's hitting my brain.

"Not really." Oh my. I sound like a total nerd. The stuffy nose and everything. Damnit this is not a good day! He smirks, shuts the door and locks it.

"I'll make it up to you, okay?" Yes! I can finally do it! He forces me to lie on my stomach again. Damnit. What is he doing? I thought…urgghh. No way, **I'm** going to be on bottom. No fair.

"What are you doing? Shouldn't it be the other way?!" He glares.

"You don't know how to do it yet, idiot…that is why I'm showing you. Plus, I like it better this way." Well I guess it couldn't be that bad...

**(A/N: Sorry guys...can't do sex scene...it's hard doing a sex scene in first person...you know?)**


	13. Chapter 13

YES! We finally had sex. Except it kind of sucked for me. My ass really hurts. I mean, really badly…I can barely walk. The worst part is that Konohamaru tried to open the door in the middle of it, but we told him to go away and he did. Sasuke's in the kitchen making all of us lunch while I'm sitting on a chair trying to heal my but. Sasuke seems much happier now that we had sex…I guess so am I.

Crap! I forgot to give him his laptop. I'll get to it in a second…when my ass relaxes a little. Konohamaru and Sasuke are getting along and it's annoying me…then whenever I try and say something to Konohamaru, he's all 'he's only eight you know…relax'…but I'm not going to let this kid get away with everything! He's eating lunch right now. Sasuke made me ramen noodles…I can smell them.

"Naruto…" That's my signal. I walk back to the table and am forced to sit next to Konohamaru. Oh well…at least Sasuke's going to be sitting next to me. I begin slurping up all my ramen and Sasuke's slowly eating a sandwich.

I stare at him for a while, and then he looks at me with the cutest smile with his mouth half full with food. He's saying something but I'm too spaced out to make out what he's saying. Snap out of it Naruto! God, I'm so in love with him it's scary. I shake my head and my mouth hangs open cluelessly.

"Huh?" He chuckles a little and the brat laughs. I glare at Konohamaru and cross my arms. "What's so funny?" Sasuke looks at me with widened eyes and the lowers them in annoyance.

"Naruto…stop being so freaking rude." I narrow my eyes and sigh. I hate Konohamaru. After lunch, Konohamaru watches TV and Sasuke and I go to my room where Sasuke's Christmas present lays. I never told him I got him a Christmas present, but I'm sure it's better this way.

I pull a box from under my bed. The box is wrapped crappily with pieces of tape everywhere and with the gayest, childish wrapping paper on it. Sasuke looks at me, not even surprised. I manage to smile and hand him the present. He retrieves it from my grasp and looks at it, then back at me.

"Can I open it now?"

"Yeah, if you want to….I mean it is Christmas Eve." He looks back to the box and rips through the wrapping. His eyes widen and a small gasp manages to slip out of his lips.

"Naruto…how…how did you afford this? I thought your mom was using all of your step dad's money…" I smile. I don't know if I should tell him or not. Shut up Naruto…there couldn't be a more perfect time.

"You really want to know? The truth?" Sasuke nods and I lean in closer to peek his interest a little more. "You can't tell anyone but," my voice degenerates into a soft whisper, "I joined a gang…" His eyes widen and narrow at the same time and I back up because he looks like he's about to explode. He looks mad. He shouldn't be mad. There's nothing really wrong with being in a gang.

"You…what?" I sigh.

"Do I really have to repeat myself? Something wrong? Are you mad at me or something?" He turns away and places the box on my lap.

"I don't want it if that's how you earned the money." What? Does he know how long it took me? How many people I've had to kill?

"Do you know how many things I've had to do just to get you that…if you don't take it I swear I'll—"

"Did you kill anyone?" My eyes shift to the ground.

"Yeah." My voice turns from a stern yell to a weak whisper.

"Then…I'm not taking it…I don't associate with gang members…talk to me when you're not in a gang, okay?" What!? How could he do this? He gets up and starts for the door.

"Sasuke wait!" He doesn't. I get up and try and come after him but he begins to run. Aw man, I lost him. If he doesn't want me in a gang then so be it. I can't take it when he's upset or mad at me.


	14. Chapter 14

Later that night, I meet with my gang as usual, but this time…it's unusual because I'm going to ask to leave. When I walk up to them, they look at me with expectancy. The leader smiles.

"Your next mission is to-"I raise one hand as a sign of surrender.

"I want out." They all look at me in amazement then the leader raises an eyebrow. He starts coming closer to me, almost cornering me.

"You know it ain't that easy man." He says in a cruel tone. I don't even look at him…I don't want to admit it, but I'm kind of afraid to deny anything they tell me to do.

"Well, what do I have to do?" They all laugh.

"Kill your true love." My….true love? Whoa, you wouldn't hear that from any gangster out on the street. I love Sasuke. Does that mean I have to kill him? But the whole reason I'm getting out of this gang is for him.

Damnit. But he seems so wrapped up in Gaara…telling me to spend Halloween with Hinata…wait….Hinata. I'm still going out with her. I know this is going to sound totally fucked up…but I'd do anything for Sasuke and if that means killing someone I barely know then so be it. I smirk at my brilliant idea but then put a worried look on my face.

"I…I have to kill Hinata?" I act so innocent but really I just want to get it over with. They all smirk at me and pat me on the back.

"You wanted out…that what you get…" I look at them and pick up my phone. I call Hinata. She picks up on the first ring.

"H…hello?" I act so normal it scares me.

"Hey, you want to come over?" I hear a gasp on the other line and look at the phone with one eyebrow raised.

"Sh…Sure!! I'll be over in a minute!" She hangs up. How does she even know where I live? Oh well. I wait for a long time when I see a small, shy-looking figure that sees me and runs to her deathtrap. When she gets there she smiles to me until she realizes there are a bunch of gangsters surrounding her. She shrieks as I take out my knife and…you know. I feel a hint of depression take over my soul as I turn away.

"You ain't finished! You gotta dispose the evidence man!" I look back at them, then to Hinata's remains. I can't believe I just did that…and all for someone who doesn't really act like he cares about me. Shikamaru looks to me with a sympathetic look and walks up to me. He puts one hand on my shoulder, sweating with every emotion all in one. I look into his eyes with expectancy.

"Don't worry…I'll take care of it." He says in a soft, whispering tone. "Just go home." I don't even respond…not with a face…not with anything. I just turn back and head for home with my hands in my pockets. This is by far the worst Christmas Eve of my life.

I want to cry so badly, I want to just let every single emotion out…but I've been bottling them for so long that they just simply won't come out anymore. It's like they're all stuck in there, until I see Sasuke. Then love explodes freely from my pores and I practically scream I'm in love with him. As I approach my door hesitantly, I notice something on the ground. Look's like…a note…Oh, looks like I can walk into someone business. I pick it up and unfold it.

_My dearest Gaara,_

_I think I'm falling for you…I don't know what is it…but I feel it in you._

_I can't stop thinking about you._

_You're amazing._

_I love you so much_

_So much that words can't describe how much I love you._

_You make me feel so happy,_

_You make me smile almost everyday._

_I can't wait to see you._

_I can't wait for you._

_Man, I miss you…Naruto's been up my ass for a long time now and_

_I haven't been able to see you lately…_

_It's really bothering me._

_Anyways,_

_I love you._

_Love (and I do mean __love__),_

_Sasuke 3_

My eyes widen as I lower the note slowly from my sight. I can't believe him. Was he just playing with me? Was I just a game to him? I don't understand it. Who does he really love? How can someone possibly fall in love with someone like Gaara? Why not me?

I've always been there for him. On top of it all, I just killed someone to be with him. I walk into my house with the note hanging lazily off of my fingers attached to my arm which is acting as if I don't have any feeling in it at all. I stumble to my room and find a bottle of vodka under my bed. I guess I'll just have to drink Sasuke away.


	15. Chapter 15

Ow…my head. What happened? I look at my hand, which clings tightly to the note. I look down realizing my depression state. Well, today's Christmas. I've never gotten a Christmas present in my life….well Sasuke gave me candy cane on Christmas because he felt sorry for me. No damnit! Sasuke, get out of my head. I drop the note…I don't need to know again what it said though the words keep repeating in my head like a flashback trying to torture me. I reach in my pocket for my phone…I've got to call him…There's just something in my chest that won't stop me. I call him and it rings once…twice…three times…funny…he usually picks up on the first ring. Four times.

"Hello?" he sounds annoyed. I fake a smile and try to sound as happy as I can.

"Merry Christmas Sasuke! I want to tell you something."

"What?"

"Well, you know that thing I told you about earlier? Well, I got out of it."

"Okay…um…good for you…"

"So now you can talk to me right?" He sighs, annoyed I can tell. Everything I do is annoying. He's always mad at me…he's always got to hate on me for something.

"I don't know…I guess." He guesses?

"I…you still love me right?" god, that was pathetic. Naruto…why did you have to say something so STUPID! I hate you I hate you I hate you.

"Yeah….I guess…now if you don't mind…it's Christmas…and unlike you I have a family to tend to…so I got to go…bye" How could he say something so mean.

"I love—"Too late…he hung up. Oh what a freaking genius I am. I feel terrible. I just want to go jump off a bridge. Who gives a damn about me anyway? I would be doing the world the biggest favor ever. The only person who did like me is Hinata and I just killed her. Before I know it, a tear runs down my cheek. I haven't cried since I got shot in the arm at the orphanage. I slap myself across the face.

"Don't show weakness you're truly pathetic!" I shout to myself, hoping it'll make me stop crying. It doesn't work like it used to. It even makes me cry more knowing that's how I get myself to stop crying. Just then I hear a knock on the door. I wait to hear any noise at all afterwards. No one is home. Merry fucking Christmas to me. I walk to the door and sling it open….tears still running down my cheeks. It's a police officer. He looks down at me and glares.

"Are you Naruto Uzumaki?" I nod slowly…wondering what the hell this is about. He grabs my arm and forcefully pins me to the ground with my arms behind my back. "You're under arrest for killing in gang violence. Anything you say can and will be used in the court of law."

What?! Who snitched on me! Who?! I don't even bother struggling. What's the point anymore? I could care less if someone just shot me right now. The police forces me back up and holds me by the hair, almost tearing my nerves out. He takes me to a police car and pushes me in the backseat. I'm completely silent.

"You have any family Uzumaki?" the partner in the passenger's seat says looking back at me. I don't want to answer that question but I have to.

"Not much. Just a mom." They both laugh and then the guy in the passenger's seat gets ready to whisper.

"I always knew this so called 'demon' would cause trouble. I told the governor to kill him but he said he didn't believe in demons." They both laugh for some reason and act as though I wasn't supposed to hear them. What I don't get is why that's so funny. It takes about an hour before we finally reach the police station.

They drag me out of the car and I'm pulled into a dark room with nothing but a window, a chair and a table. I wait there for about an hour before some detective-looking guy comes out and stares at me.

"I'd like to make this plain and simple, okay?" I nod. I don't care. It's not like my mom's going to try and bail me out if I do get put into jail. Sasuke wouldn't either. "Were you in a gang?" I nod. He smiles, knowing it's going to be much easier than he thought. "Did you kill Hinata Hyuuga?" I nod. He looks at me in disgust but then continues to look at his stupid clipboard. "How many people would you say that you've killed?" I shrug my shoulders.

"A lot I guess." I finally manage to squeak out. He nods and leaves the room. I look back at the window into the next room, but I can't see anything. What are they going to do? Will I get court order or what? I wait about another hour until the same man comes out, along with a police officer.

"You…you've been sentenced to death…we called the number of your house…she said she had a son…but he was 8….so I guess a kid like you couldn't afford a court case, huh….Well, doubt anyone will miss you…demon…" They look at me halfly sympathetic and half glaring and hating me. I can't believe my mom would do something like that. Well, actually…never mind. I look up to him.

"Can I make one last phone call…you know…one last request…one last person to see before I…." I pause, not wanting to say the rest.

"Yeah, I doubt anyone will want to see you…but go ahead…your date is sooner than the others…this week actually…Friday" I look down. I don't care anymore. I actually can't wait until I die. I look at my wrist watch and it's eleven. I look back up to him.

"So…can I?" He rolls his eyes.

"Yeah…go ahead…you have a cell phone?" I nod and take it out. He snatches it from my hands and looks through it…pressing buttons and looking back to me.

"You only have 4 contacts on your phone?" I nod sadly. He smirks. "Mom, Hinata, Sasuke, Shikamaru…" he repeats the contacts while handing me my phone. I grab it and call Sasuke. It rings once and I hear an answer.

"Hey Naruto…what's up?" he sounds annoyed.

"Hey…uhh…Sasuke…I…I'm up for death sentence…" I hear a gasp on the other line.

"You got caught?!" He practically screams on the phone.

"Yeah…and…I…I was interrogated and stuff…"

"What did your mom say?"

"She denied ever having me…"

"Oh my god Naruto…are you okay?" I like this attention he's giving me.

"Not really Sasuke…I'm going to die…They allow me to have my last requests right before I die…can you come see me on that day? Maybe visit me everyday?"

"Of course Naruto! When is the day?"

"Friday…"

"THIS FRIDAY?!" I nod but then realize that Sasuke can't see me nod.

"Yeah…" He's silent, all I can hear is him choking up. Sasuke's crying over me? "Sasuke…are you there? Are you coming?" Before I know it, a tear starts forming in my right eye.

"Yeah…yeah I'm here. Don't worry." He still cracking up (crying wise that is…not laughing). I look up to the guy and he looks at his watch.

"2 minutes left….there is visiting hours tomorrow at 8, noon, and 5." He says a little annoyed. My eyes widen. That's a lot of visiting time. Well, today is a Tuesday…so I have about three days to live, or see Sasuke.

"Listen Sasuke…I'm at the juvenile prison downtown…I've only got like one minute on this thing so after this I have to go…visiting hours…umm…8, 12, and 5…throughout the day…come see me please…everyday…I love you okay?" He's still crying.

"Yeah…see you then...I love you Naruto…I mean it…I'm so sorry…I really am." Just hearing him saying that makes me want to cry but I don't.

"Alright…thanks Sasuke…that means a lot to me…I love you too…Come visit me…Bye." I hang up. The detective holds out his hand to take my phone and I give it to him. He shuts it off and motions me to stand up.

"We know you probably have weapons so we need to commit a full body cavity search." I stand up completely freaked out. Full body cavity search? Ew…that means they search _everywhere_ in every hole possible. Oh god. This is going to suck majorly, but luckily I won't remember it because I'm going to die in three days. Yeah I know it sucks but now it just doesn't phase me. I should care more but I just don't. He walks up to me and cuffs me then takes me out of the room but into another empty room with nothing but a table and another guy but this guy has gloves. The detective pushes me inside and leaves with a look of disgust on his face. I stare at the door as I hear it lock. I've never had a full body cavity search before. The guy in gloves looks at me. He has a digusting hairy mole above his lip. It's huge. I can't help but stare at it.

"Strip your clothes…shoes included." Fuck. I have a knife that I keep in my sock. Oh no. Well, it's not like I'll get in even more trouble. I start by taking off my sweatshirt and then move down to the shoes as I cover my you know what. He begins searching through my shoes and finds a knife. He puts it in a plastic bag and smirks. "Found one thing…" He looks through all of my pockets in my sweatshirt…in my pants. Then, once he's finished with that he looks at me. "Table….lay on it." He says in a demanding tone. It sounds like he's trying to rape me. I do what I am told and lay on the table on my back, still covering my dick.

He reaches under the table and finds straps then puts them around me. He gets a remote and pushes the first button on there making the table raise and then it forces me straight up so I'm standing in the air…strapped. He tightnes his gloves in that freaky way you see in the movies. It sends chills down my spine. He looks at me and makes my eyes widen with his fingers as he shines a light in them making my eyes burn. I wince as he shines the light under my nostrils and raises my nostrils so I look like a pig. My eyes stare at him in curiousity as he forces my mouth open and looks everywhere into it. He grabs my tounge and makes it move place I would never dream it could reach. He then goes to my belly button. Oh no….my biggest hot spot in the world.

He begins poking it with a stick while I'm trying not to moan and scream. I close my eyes pretending I'm somewhere else…with Sasuke…yeah…and he's the one touching me. I bite my bottom lip as I feel him go lower and lower until…oh no…I feel something cold coming towards it. It's AHHH! I open my eyes and scream as a needle is shoved into the hole in which my urine flows freely from. My eyes begin to water for it hurts worse than anything I've ever done.

I wince as he slowly takes it out and comes close to me. He unstraps me and forces me to lay on my stomach. I don't fight back but simply let him since I'm too overwhelmed that there was just a needle in my dick. I can hear his gloves tightening. Is he going to do what I'm thinking about…yeah…He sticks his gloved finger into my entrance and swishes it around. He takes it out and unstraps me. I get up and run over to my clothes and cover myself, scared.

"Are…are we done now?" He nods and motions the other guy to come in. I start to put my clothes on when the detective pushes me to the ground and takes my clothes only to replace them with a orange jail thing.

"Oh on you don't….you know you're going to juvie…now come on…let's go…" I already have my boxers on so I just put it over them. Man, this is going to suck. The guy goes to the nearest jail sell and throws me in as I fall to the floor and he locks it.


	16. Chapter 16

I wake up with a jolt and sweat everywhere

I wake up with a jolt and sweat everywhere. I look around. I'm…home…? Was it all a dream? I violently pull the covers to the side with an attempt to rush out of my room to see if my mom is there but fail miserably by tripping over my covers scattered all over the floor. I get up and run out of my room and see all of my family sitting by the fire in Christmas outfits. My mother looks at me and smiles.

"Finally, you're up…Merry Christmas…" Her smile is warm-hearting. Konohamaru runs up to me and hugs me.

"Are you okay? You look like a mess! We've already started to open presents! All that's left is yours. So come on!" He drags me to two presents beside the small fireplace. I pick the first one up and stare at it.

"Go on…open it." Sarutobi says in a supposedly kidding way. I tear it open and I look at what's under the wrapping…socks…I stare at it for a little while and without a word I pick up the other present and open it. Oh my god. Porn…?

"You're a growing young man, Naruto…" my mom says in a serious tone. What the hell? I shrug and hug everyone before running back to my room. I pick up my cell phone and call Sasuke. I wait for endless amount of rings for him to pick up.

"Hello?"

"Hey Sasuke…it's me…" He sighs and hangs up. I call him again.

"What Naruto?"

"Before you hang up…can I just say a couple of things? I'm not in a gang anymore…okay? And I wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas…and I love you….and I had a really bad dream so can you please just talk to me?" He sighs again.

"Yeah…sure…"

"Please….Sasuke….tell me the truth…I found a note from you to Gaara and it said terrible things on it….do you love him?"

"Naruto…I broke up with him….that was a letter that one of the girls did to try and get me back together with him…though I didn't really want to."

"Can I come over?"

"No…" he laughs. "it's Christmas….I'll see you tomorrow okay?"

"Alright."

"I love you Naruto…I mean it….sorry it took me so long to break up with Gaara…he can be so pushy sometimes." A really wide smile begins to form all over my face.

"I love you too Sasuke…see you tomorrow." I hang up and walk back out of the room to spend the rest of the Christmas day with my new found 'family'.


End file.
